Trouble at Mill

Another difficult weekend at home and trouble at mill, with the mother of my child demonstrating her displeasure of having my partner staying over and hogging the conversation over the kitchen table on Friday night with a mutual friend.

Some would say, quite right. What did you expect? I would argue: she can always leave…alone and without my daughter. But that’s not going to happen for all the reasons stated before: mostly financial but practical too.

She has a roof over her head, fridge is always full, no bills to pay, no mortgage to pay, a permanent child minder so why would she leave?

It is however difficult to negotiate the finer points of social intercourse when friends pop over and no doubt equally difficult for those friends to understand how to behave in front of the ‘two women of the house’.

Saturday one of my friends pops in for a coffee and of course, she is out there like shot eager to hold court. I get no time to chat with my pal alone..most annoying.

After 15 years in this area, you would have thought she would have made friends of her own. No, not one. Any friends she has made in this area are mutual and are as a result of my daughter’s school, which in reality means three mums, only one she sees regularly and that’s because I look after her daughter most Fridays.

Any other friends she has are long-established from her own days at uni and even then, there is only one in this area who she sees on an infrequent basis. Does she not have a social life, my friends ask? I say not that I’m aware of, but having said that, she does leave the house between 8.30 and 9.30 in the morning and is rarely back before 9pm so she may well have a limited social life, who knows? But this cannot be a normal way to behave can it? Surely after so many years in the same area you would have developed your own circle of friends wouldn’t you?

For her part, I must wonder if her sense of pride is so low down on her list of priorities that is willing to endure the ‘other’ woman in the house in order to put off that eventual day when our daughter is of a certain age when she has to fly the nest and set off to university: a day when I am expecting the mother to also leave. She cannot possibly imagine I will tolerate her for a moment longer as she knows the only reason she is here is because she holds all the cards…the only card, the threat of taking my daughter away. With that threat removed, she will no longer have any hold and I can get on with my life and she can get on with hers too.

But I get this strange feeling that not all is as it should be. What is she doing with her salary? As I said, she has no bills apart from the broadband package which I forced her to pay after years of putting up with ridiculous phone bills – I notice there are no astronomical bills any longer just the rental. She hasn’t taken a holiday in years and certainly nothing with my daughter in lord knows how many years, so is she saving for a deposit on a house of her own? One can only hope so, for her sake!


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